Things you should never know

     I'm trying not to care.

     Sometimes I wanted to be cold. And I wanted to like you less than I do.

     The problem is that I want to marry you, and have children with you (not now, in a distant future). But I don't want you to know this because you would run away.

     I just want to be with you all the time. But if I do it... If I do it you would think I'm a crazy woman desperate for someone to love. But you are the guy. You are my guy. You are the guy I dreamed of since I was a stupid teenager.

      But I can't also tell you this, because I'm sure: you would disappear.

     So i shut up my mouth and I cry alone at night. However you can't know that because you would think I'm immature.

     I want to be the best for you. I want to be your girl like you are my guy. But it's not being easy... Because I am crazy and immature and I like you. I could say "love", but if I do you would think I'm used to tell the same thing to every guy that crosses my eyes. Which is not true because you are the only one.

     Honey, if you are not my soulmate... if you don't like me the way I do... then I'm lost. But if I'm really not your soulmate, and if you really don't like me the way I like you... please, just tell me and run away. I'll be okay, I promess.